Addiction hides but it never sleeps!
My experience with GHB began about 10 years ago (when it was still legal). I was looking for a cutting-edge "legal high" and eventually found myself purchasing a book on GHB at a major book store chain, a book which was written by a doctor.
The book advocated GHB use as a nutritional supplement as well as for a variety of medical problems. It also provided detailed instructions for making the drug.
I located a scientific supply store that sold the precursor chemical and proceeded to start my experimenting- on myself.
I won't mince words here: I was instantly addicted to the drug. I loved the way it made me feel. I tried to regulate the dosage, but even in my impaired state, I knew I was playing a dangerous game. Still, it seemed like it was worth the risk. My experiences with the drug only ran over a six month period. At the end of that six months, I was either going to quit GHB or kill myself taking it.
These are some of the highlights of my short history of GHB use:
-Passing out behind the wheel at an intersection. I "snapped out of it" for the police and paramedics and talked them into believing my medication was to blame.
Instead of going to jail like I should have, I got a ride home. I used the drug again immediately.
-Passing out at the wheel and rolling into a car. I drove off after the impact, to avoid going to jail.
-Passing out at the wheel and driving into someone's front yard.
-Weaving all over the interstate (unconscious). After numerous people called the Highway Patrol, I was pulled over. Again, I was somehow able to "snap out of it"
and convince them my medication was the cause, and avoid going to jail.
-At a party, I started acting extremely erratically under the influence of GHB, and several people at the party basically forced me to go to the emergency room.
I used the drug as soon as I got home.
-Waking up on the patio with paramedics and my frantic mother looking down at me. Going to the emergency room in an ambulance. I used the drug again as soon as I got home.
-Going into a semi-catatonic state at work. Paramedics were called. I nearly stopped breathing on the way to the hospital. I used the drug as soon as I got home.
-I went to visit my girlfriend in a small hospital after just taking a large dose. The nurses instantly noticed a problem and I was taken to a trauma center by ambulance.
-Several people reported that I exhibited symptoms of apnea when I was "sleeping off" the drug. Any one of those times, I could have stopped breathing forever.
-I woke up on the ground numerous times after having lost consciousness and collapsed. One time I woke up in a chair and was choking on my own vomit.
experiences did not deter me from using the drug again.
The above instances just hint at the anguish I caused my family and friends.
I've been alcohol and drug free for about 10 years now. My main drugs of abuse were alcohol, pain pills, marijuana, and Xanax. My pain pill addiction was so bad that I had to go on Methadone for 8 months. Then came the GHB. There is no comparison. GHB had me addicted unlike any of the others.
I was in drug treatment three times after my GHB use began. I was also in several emergency rooms. With one exception, none of the healthcare professionals who treated me seemed to know a thing about GHB (just one ER doc who had a sister addicted to the drug). Hopefully, there's more professional knowledge out there these days.
As an experienced drug user, I can say GHB is in a class by itself. It's an upper and a downer. It's simple yet extremely unpredictable. It's very easy to make if the materials are available. If you fall in love with it, it will leave a hole in our life- if you are lucky enough to break free from it.
For those who are trying to break free, I'd recommend a few things. First, find a psychiatrist or drug treatment professional who is familiar with the drug.
may need treatment for anxiety and depression for awhile, at least. I'd caution against taking anti-anxiety medications with abuse potential, such as Clonopin, Xanax, or Ativan. If you think counseling or a support group would be helpful to you, actively seek them out. Consider making your lifestyle conducive to healing and developing greater strength. Try exercising, meditation, or whatever relaxes you and grounds you. Most importantly, stay away from people, places, or web sites where the drug is available. I have overcome and accomplished so much since I stopped using GHB, but I still get scared when I think of what I might do if I were left alone in a room with a bottle of it. Addiction hides but it never sleeps!
Many Californians who are addicted to prescription drugs choose to check into California methadone clinics for detoxification.